Physical Intimacy

I grew up in a strict household, I mean a household where there was plenty of love and support by my parents really tried to shield us from anything going on in the world. Meaning, no television, and a lot of other censoring taking place in the home. I know my parents were trying to protect us from the filth that can be projected in the media, the promiscuity that is abundant in our world and try to guide us to safety. However, in a way this seemed to backfire. In our home words such as sex, butt, and even fart were akin to swear words, which honestly as a mother to a 10 year old boy I understand that potty humor can get a little old. However feeling like words those words off limits also made those things off limits for conversation. My parents chose to not allow me to attend the sex-ed class in 7th grade and I really just felt the whole subject was taboo and evil.

Reading Sean E. Brothersons “Fullfilling the Sexual Stewardship in Marriage” struck so many chords with me because I could definitely relate to the dialogue that Latter-day Saints hear:

“(1) The incessant chatter and noise of the world, Satan, and related sources that constantly hype and sensationalize sexual intimacy with distorted images of sensuality and misplaced or twisted values and expressions of sexuality.

(2) The powerful and compelling warnings of prophetic leaders and caring Church members who seek to steer us away from pornography, sexual exploitation, and immorality in sexual matters.

Too often we listen only to the first two strands of the dialogue, and if we listen long enough, we may come to believe that the only kind of discussion about sexuality that is warranted is the dialogue about what Satan tempts us to do and what the Church teaches us not to do.”

After getting married I found myself struggling with those negative feelings that are written about in Brotherson’s article. It was enlightening to me to read an in depth document about how this type of stereo-type needs to be remedied to combat “Problems in this area of a marriage relationship can severely impact couple communication and caring, and leads often to insecurity, anxiety, frustration, anger, emotional alienation, and even divorce.” While I didn’t have the benefit of this document to help me overcome these issues I did have a knowledge that sex was an important part of marriage, I also had a close relationships with my sisters that I could talk to (my mother had passed away by the time I had married) and a patient husband who wanted us to both feel comfortable and fulfilled.

I do feel like the church is trying to educate and prepare it’s members not only in the subject of sexual intimacy but in many other areas of topics and I’m grateful for that. I’m grateful for a church that knows the importance of knowledge, values education and wants to empower its members to live their best life